The Most Beautiful Successful & Loyal Women have never been taken out on a real date.
“Many females are gold diggers, too stuck up, so how can I approach? If you don’t have a big bank account to spoil on them, they won’t let you ask them out,” a tall, muscular, Australian futures trader asked me at a public speak I did for a group of business men, through a third-party cooperation.
“The Most Beautiful Successful Women have never been taken out on a real date; not because they are gold diggers, cocky, stuck up or unapproachable. Beautiful Women are actually the most approachable, sweetest, friendly, financially independent, caring women,” I responded. “As men, we must be chivalrous enough to ask her out on a REAL date, plan and pay for everything. But don’t “ask” her; be confident and say,
“I would like to take you out on a date this Thursday to hear live music after dinner, a deep conversation and a walk on the boardwalk; what time are you available?”
You don’t ask a woman out; you ask her what time she’s available. This is out of respect, because a woman has the right to take however long she wants getting dressed. Perhaps her eyebrows are a bit bushy, and she needs to see her specific threader, maybe her toe nails are a bit on the eagle claw side and she needs a pedicure; but she’s DESERVING of a date, so to even ask her the question, as if it is in question, is disrespect. Let her know when you want to take her out, then give her the option to let you know if she feels you deserve to be graced with her presence on a date.
Never tell a woman:
“Let’s meet up”
“Let’s hang”
“Let’s kick it”
“Let’s chill”
No, ask her when she’s available for a date.
She is NOT your ‘bro’. Treat her like a woman. Don’t ask a woman, ‘so where do you want to go?” No, you plan it. You pick the venues and events; yes events plural. Please do not take a woman simply to a movie on a first date young kings.
She doesn’t know you from a random stray yorkie on the street; the last thing you want to do is spend two hours with a woman sitting in a dark room, not talking to her and not looking at her. She might as well have stayed home and watched Scandal in the comfort of her own bed, cuddling with her cat or dog. At least then, her phone would be fully charging, instead of it dying while she’s dying inside; stuck sitting next to a male with not enough romance to take her somewhere exciting for a date.
Women long for spontaneous acts of romance. She’s both an intellect who needs to be mentally stimulated, as well as a goofy young woman with an inappropriate sense of humor, who needs to be stimulated with sarcastic wit and a dash of randomness.
“So why should I pay just to sleep with a woman? Most women let you sleep with them on the first night free of charge anyway,” a British man with a heavy accent asked.
“You’re not paying for sex when you treat a woman on a date,” I answered. “See, diamonds are pursued, because their worth is clearly valued and treasured. You are treating her to a date, because she is DESERVING. If you spoil her with consistency and attention, she will spoil you with love and loyalty. Sure a promiscuous female may sleep with you on the first date, but a mentally mature woman knows; you don’t deserve to lay with her, if you’re not willing to take her out on a date and prove to her why you deserve any of her time.
We have to check yourselves as men; some males only commit to a woman, not because he is ready to be faithful to her, only because he doesn’t want any other men having sex with her. The reason some males are hesitant to commit to a woman is, because he knows he is afraid of love and afraid to get his commitment broken; but he wants to have sex with promiscuous women, because he knows they will never ever break his heart, as they only want sex. It is up to us to be strong-minded men, and not be so emotional, we are hesitant to commit to a woman. Be sure of the real reason you don’t ever ask a woman out on a date; it may just be, because you’re afraid of love.
When I’m on a date with a Woman, I like to make her laugh; see her cheese and smile hard. I like to hold her hand and hug her close, so I can feel her heart beat through her chest and onto mine. I like to look her in her eyes the whole time we deeply converse and wax sarcasm. Little things like that make taking a woman out on a date so special. You may think that’s corny, but women prefer a corny man over an arrogant asshole who is too afraid to bring her a bouquet of flowers, because he doesn’t want to be called ‘corny’ by his male friends.
I want you young kings to know, there are women out there who think good, successful men like you don’t exist, and that is because we as men have to step it up with our actions. What defines a king is not his physical physique, nor his sexual prowess; what defines a king is his actions matching his regal thought pattern. Many young women have never met a good man like you, and are starting to doubt whether or not chivalrous men like you even exist.
I received a tweet recently from a young Canadian woman who really humbled me. She asked, ‘@EbrahimAseem can you tell me why beautiful women who want commitment will never be asked on a real date, but a stripper will?”
Reading that made me feel guilty as a man, not just because of the sad-face emoji that preceded the tweet. It was because of the sincerity in her tone, and even though her statement doesn’t directly apply to me or reflect my own behavior; the fact so many women feel this way, makes me see I’m not doing enough as a man to show young kings, the importance of faithfully committing yourself to a woman is; it will teach us the discipline to mentality mature as a man and the responsibility that can help us in our career, education, family and every aspect of our lives.
Some males are too scared to even ask a woman out, so he instead will say, ‘you wanna grab lunch?’ Males do this for one of two reasons: he is either very shy and inexperienced in dating a respectable woman, or he wants to use the friend-zone role against a woman, so she can never expect commitment from him.
As men, we have to make our intentions with a woman crystal clear. From the moment we first take her out on a date; she should know whether or not it is a platonic date, or if there is any romantic interest involved. Don’t waste her time; tell a woman on the first date,
‘Sweetheart, just as clear as I can see my reflection in your deep brown eyes, I can clearly see you are deserving of commitment and faithfulness from the man of your dreams. I want to get to know you to see how compatible I am with you, in efforts of pursuing a possible relationship with you in the near future. I understand this may take time, however, I intend to take you out on dates consistently and court you, affording you the ability to clearly see for yourself if I’m worthy of your commitment.’
After you tell her this, respect whatever decision she makes. If she let’s you know she doesn’t want to pursue anything further with you; do not stalk a woman, blow up her phone, try to communicate with her on various social networks and make her fear for her safety. You’re just proving why she was initially correct in not giving you the opportunity to pursue anything with her.
Conversely, if she does let you know she wants to pursue something with her, do not waste valuable time you could be spending getting to know her, trying to have sex with her.
If you really like a woman, don’t text her repeatedly asking her, ‘so when are we going to be able to romantically express ourselves with each other?’ Don’t text her repeatedly asking her to send you pictures; and please don’t send a woman pictures of your penis she didn’t as for.
If you really like her, walk into her job and surprise her with flowers. There’s a 1800Flowers app right in your phone. Show up to her job during her lunch break with her favorite flowers in hand and say, ‘Good afternoon gorgeous, these are for you. Now, grab your coat and your cell phone from the charger; I’m taking you out for lunch today. What time are you taking your lunch?’ Again, don’t ASK her out, ask her what time she’s available to go out with you.
It’s always males who have never attracted a successful, intelligent woman of substance who say, ‘I refuse to spend money on getting to know a woman; I’m no woman’s trick.” Understand this young kings; it is NOT tricking to spoil a woman who is deserving of being treated, its all about hospitality. If I invite you over my house, I’m going to cook for you, correct?. I’m not going to tell you to order a pizza; nor am I going to make you go half on a pizza with me. You are blessing me with your company, so it is only right that I be hospitable enough to treat you.
Likewise, if you ask or invite a woman out for a date, why the hell would you ask her to pay for her own food, or pay her own admission? She is blessing you with her company and her presence. Understand, it is not up to a woman to pursue a man and give you attention to let you know she likes you. The woman is the treasure, and is to be pursued as such. I have never seen a diamond have to find a man who can treasure its value and appreciate its worth. Good women are diamonds in this regard.
If you see a woman is caring, loyal and deserving; let your spoil adorn her. A grown woman with her own money, should not always have to spend her own money. Make her call off work, but give her what she would have made that day at work, and then some. Then, surprise her with a trip to a snorkeling resort with a spa, mani/pedi treatment, so you she can enjoy spontaneous entertainment that day, before you treat her to a live jazz show that night.
Women are not gold diggers, a weak-minded female who lacks self ambition may be a gold digger, but an ambitious woman is not. Regardless, a woman’s pockets should never affect how much you spoil her with. She can make good money; still spoil the hell out of her, and when she wants to do something special for you, she will spoil the hell out of you; but you’re not doing it so she will sleep with you or commit to you. A woman knows whether or not she will ever sleep with a man, commit to a man, or if she will never give a man a second date based off how you behave on the first.
If when the bill comes, and a woman asks you, ‘how much is our bill? I’ll pay half,’ and you are cheap enough to ALLOW her to pay half, she will smile at you, pay it and never give you a second date. You just failed her test; oh yes. A woman has little tests she administers on a man, to see what type of man he is. Of course she has her own money; she just wants to see whether or not she is in the hands of a man, or a cheap ass little boy.
Never disrespect a woman by making her treat herself on a date you asked her for. She thought you were asking her out to prove to her why you deserve any of her time. Don’t make her regret giving you her number in the first place. If you’re not going to pursue a woman with enough consistency to take her out on a date within a week of her showing you with her hints and actions that she likes you; she will feel you are waiting her time, and she will cease to respond to your texts.
Text etiquette means everything to a woman of the twenty-first century. Even if she has a major crush on you, she still wants you to text her first. Loyal women are old-fashioned; they love to be pursued. However, if a woman does text you back and hours go by and her text just sits there unread; laying in your phone, like a homeless man on a park bench; meanwhile she knows, that you know, that she can see you liking multiple IG honeys’ pictures on Instagram; she will at that point put you on her ‘un-datable’ list on the tablet in her mind.
Don’t complain to a woman, asking her why she never: texts you back, comes to see you, or returns your calls; that’s unmanly. It’s not that she’s ‘ignoring’ you or ‘curving’ you. She is genuinely just tired of you wasting her time. She’s not ‘going ghost’; loyal women simply know a male doesn’t deserve her time if he isn’t willing to put in the consistent effort to earn it. You have yet to take her out on a real date, you have yet to articulate to her you want to date her exclusively and you still have yet to completely cut off your EXs. She can tell you obviously are not mature enough to commit to her, so don’t be surprised when she treats you like a stranger.
Inconsistency is a turn off to a loyal woman. The Idea women are more attracted to men who don’t show them any attention is false. Yes, it is attractive to a woman when a man is busy with his career and education enough to be married to his ambition, yet makes time for her. However, if you are giving random girls on social networks the time and attention you could be giving her; it will completely turn her off to you.
The more attention you give a woman, the more likely she is to allow her feelings for you to grow. When you take a woman on a date, or spend time with her in any way, she should have your full undivided attention. Not half your attention on her, half your attention of every notification that pops up on your cell phone. Your phone should not even be visible when you and her are spending one on one time; that is her time. You’re on a date with her, not your phone. It’s a turn off to a woman when she hears your phone notifications constantly going off while she is giving you the time and attention every man in her phone wishes they were getting from her. She wants to know if you can be loyal to her before a commitment with her.
The worst thing you can do to a strong-minded woman is insult her intelligence. Don’t try to lie or run game on her when she questions your loyalty. Don’t lie and say, ‘I need to check my phone, it’s business.’ She knows it’s not your job texting, by the consistency of the frequent notifications. She knows back to back iMessage notifications when she hears them, and no job would be that redundant in communication.
Even if it is business, what the hell does that have to do with her? When you’re in a business meeting, you would not take time out of it to respond to her texts, nor would a mentality mature woman want you to. She can respect your ambition; besides, that time is meant for your business to have your full attention.
Likewise, when you choose and commit to a date with a woman, you are promising her your full, undivided attention. You allocated that time for her and marked that date on your calendar for that specific time to spend with her. If you needed to handle business, you should have chosen a later date; but never rob a woman of time and full attention she deserves, as you may be the very man who restore her faith in real men and true love.
Last spring, I went out on a date with a Beautiful Eritrean Woman. I met her at Target, when I saw her shopping with twin snotty-nose babies who were touching everything she rolled the double stroller by. I really loved how much she was laughing, smiling and enjoying being goofy with the identical young children she was caring for; so I approached her. After introducing myself to her; to make her laugh, I said, ‘wow you have two beautiful children,’ very loudly, then I whispered to her, ‘but you need to put their little monkey asses in check, like Rafiki did Simba with his bamboo stick.’
She laughed extremely loud when I said that, to the point people in the store started staring at us. This woman’s smile was breathtaking pretty, with the beauty and grace of a Disney Princess, yet her laugh resembled the ratchetness of the hyenas from Lion King. After coming down from her laughgasm, she replied, ‘I can’t discipline them in any way, they are not my children, I’m a professional nanny.’
To which I reply, ‘then you need to professionally spank their little asses.” At which point, she started laughing uncontrollably yet again. Young kings, it is imperative you pay attention to the signs a woman gives you. I have noticed once I make a woman have a ‘Laughgasm’ I can tell she wants me to cut to the chase and ask for her number, so I did just that. After which, I bought the four of us Wild Cherry ICEEs, because the only reason I walked into Target in the first place was strictly for an ICEE.
That same day, I called her and invited her out on a date for later that night. Young kings, please do not use the lame ‘three day rule’ to wait and call a woman after you get her number. That rule is complete and utter B.S. She’s not going to think you’re too anxious if you contact her that day; she gave you her number to use it, so oblige her desire.
Once you get a woman’s number, don’t use it exclusively to text her; use it primarily to call her. An initial text is fine, but if you do not call a woman once she gives you her number; she will not take you seriously as a man. She’s not looking for a texting buddy; she’s looking for a man to potentially give her all to. Knowing this, I called her that night and invited her out on a date, but even though she said yes; she called me back thirty minute before our date and told me she was very busy.
We ended up rescheduling three times before we had our first date two weeks to the day, from the first day we met, and I talked to her on the phone everyday up until our first date. Understand, just because a woman is busy every time you ask her out, doesn’t necessarily mean she is flaking on you. You don’t know how challenging it is for a woman who is in school, works a job, and has her own business she is starting up. You don’t know how hard it is for her to find time in her busy schedule to free up more than an hour or two. As men, we have to be understanding of a woman’s schedule, never make her feel guilty for being ambitious and having a life outside her dating life.
Once I finally took this East African woman out, I treated her to a date to a Chakra Yoga Spa before dinner and live music on the boardwalk. I planned and paid for everything, and not only did we have a great time; I had her having laughgasm session the whole not. That is my secret weapon and I want you to use this as yours young kings. I’m hilarious, witty, goofy and extremely sarcastic on a date with a woman. I do this to show her my true nature, so she knows whether or not she wants to continue to get to know me.
When I picked her up from her house in East Oakland, I greeted her with Tiger Lilies and a box of chocolate dipped strawberries I made for her, to share my love of cooking with her. Giving a woman flowers and chocolate is not corny, it’s considerate; and that chivalrous behavior is what women look for in a man.
Our yoga spa date was fun and relaxing. They taught us how to tap in to our pineal gland to promote mental ascension and how to get in tune with our chakras and have them aligned; needless to say, it was extremely deep. After yoga, we ate dinner on fisherman’s wharf, followed by a walk by the water and a two-hour conversation overlooking the San Francisco Bay. The most memorable point in the conversation for me was, when she looked deep in my eyes, and while fighting off a smile; she told me, ‘Ebrahim, I want to thank you for tonight. You really restored my faith in real men; I’m glad to know true love does exist in our generation, this is what it should be like.’
Even though I am single and enjoy going out on a fun date with a young woman, I don’t take every beautiful woman who wants my time out on a date, because in the back of my mind; I’m looking for a WIFE. Each woman I meet, I want to see if she is wife material, because I know damn well I am I’m husband material.
By the end of each first date with me, women realize; I’m not one of these typical males they are used to who are just saying all the right things so he can get her undressed. By my actions they can clearly see, I’m on a higher mental level than the males they have been exposed to, because I’m not looking for a girlfriend, I’m looking for a wife. This is what you want to embody when you take a woman out on a date young kings. The way you can get the exact queen you deserve is by showing her there’s a distinct difference between you, and every other male she’s ever met through your intention to commit to her and your ability to spoil her.
If we want our sisters to be taken out, if we want our daughters to be spoiled; as Men we must to set the first example. How you treat a woman is how your sisters will allow a man to treat them. Young kings, you have to consider that you deserve your dream woman; you deserve the caliber of woman who merits spoiling.
I will spoil the hell out of my future wife. Give her my card & let her go on shopping sprees, so she can take my sister with her. I want my woman fitted and fashionably fly at all times. If your woman is tacky & unkempt, eyebrows & nails messed up, looking like eagle’s claws gripping the bottom of her open-toe heels, tracks all showing, weave looking all wild like Mufasa’s mane; it reflects back negatively onto you as a man. The woman you pursue is a reflection of you, your ambition and your level of class, or lack thereof.
The sign of a mentally mature man is one who can commit to something, commit to a major, commit to a career, commit to a creative discipline and commit to a loyal woman, respectively. Don’t just make her a friend with sexual benefits, while stringing her heart along.
Make it official with her, and once you do; be all in. Don’t lie, cheat or talk to women on the side. Don’t make her your ‘main’, or your ‘number one’; cut off all your self-proclaimed side hoes & make her your ONE & ONLY. Take her out on a REAL date, where you plan & pay for everything; not just to your house for sex.
Commit to her; define what you and her are. Don’t make a woman feel like she’s not the only one. Don’t tell her ‘we don’t need a title’; it’s not about a damn title, it’s about loyalty. All a loyal woman really wants is consistency and attention. Don’t have her wondering all day, ‘so what are we?’ Show her off; make her feel special in front of her friends. Kiss her and tell her you love her in front of your bros; don’t switch up & treat her differently in front of your friends. Don’t hide your relationship with her. Compliment her everyday, let her know how much better she makes your life. Make her smile & happy all throughout the day; never make her sad, frustrated or feel she has no one to talk or vent to. Be the one she can talk to about her problems, listen & give solutions to her; speak life into her heart, so it vibrates through her whole body to the point she feels you give her life.
A taken woman should never feel alone or lonely while in a relationship with you. If she is loyal to you, be loyal to her. The worst feeling to a loyal woman is questioning if you are out there making her look stupid to everyone for choosing to be loyal to her. Never wait until it’s too late to show a woman how much you really love her. This is not being soft, this is not being a simp; this is being a MATURE man.
We have to wake up & come to the cognitive realization that proving our manhood to other males by disrespecting women over and over, cheating on women over and over, and entertaining the company of multiple women over and over is the definition of insanity. What proves our manhood is how much we can humble ourselves to the one who gives us all life, a woman.
I want young queens to know it is not your fault as a woman you are single. It is, however your responsibility as a woman to remember: a male will only treat you how you allow him to; he will only constantly do to you what he feels he can get away with.
One reason so many males are so hesitant to commit to a woman, is because some females allow males to sleep with her without commitment, never challenge him to be a man and meet minimal standards, and accept any kind of treatment and disloyalty from a male.
If you are so unhappy being single, you can’t enjoy your life and feel as though you “need a man”, you are not ready and fully healed for a serious relationship. Start loving your true self and stop trying to find a man. You will never need to find a man, the man you deserve will find YOU. I never seen a diamond have to find a man who can treasure it’s value and appreciate its worth. Good women are diamonds in that regard, but even a diamond must know its own worth and what it deserves; commitment.
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