{ Celebrating people for who* they really are }

"It seems to be a lot of emphasis on self-improvement these days.

We’re always trying to be a better person. I guess it’s a good thing, there’s nothing wrong with wanting a better version of yourself. So off we go in search of who we should be. 

There’s all kinds of resources out there. You can analyze your personality in 100 different ways. It’s all rather exciting! I get to categorize myself with other people that share similar personality types. I get to celebrate agreeing with what I already know about myself. If you’ve picked up on a hint of sarcasm then you are very intuitive. 

While these tools can be helpful (and no I won’t mention any of them by name, I’m sure you can figure it out) No test or quiz can accurately assess the real you. You are unique in all of creation. There has never been a you and when you are gone there will never be another you.

I think it’s important that we improve ourselves; physical, emotional, and spiritual growth is important. If we aren’t growing we’re dying; I get all that. However, sometimes our efforts to become better seem to take away from who we really are. 

We adjust our personalities to make them more palatable to the people around us. If you’re too opinionated, dial it down. Which in many cases means I don’t want to hear your opinion and if you could change and be like me, that would be great. 

Truth is, the quirkiness of the people we are in relationship with is often what drew us into the relationship in the first place. We love and hate those qualities in others, but if we remove that quirkiness we also remove an important part of their personalities. It’s like saying I really love hot sauce but could you remove all the hot stuff from it. I hate to tell but you really don’t love hot sauce then. 

Celebrate people for who they are, be honest with them when they hurt your feelings or say something to you that offends you, but don’t try to create a watered down version of who they are. Give others around you permission to be themselves and maybe others will be able to celebrate you in all your quirkiness as well."

_Marty Pronovost