// At The Cross..

By: Hillsong (Mighty To Save, 2006)


Verse 1

Oh Lord You’ve searched me,
You know my way;
Even when I fail You,
I know You love me.

Your holy presence,
Surrounding meIn every season,
I know You love me;
I know You love me.

Chorus
At the cross I bow my knee,
Where Your blood was shed for me,
There’s no greater love than this.
You have overcome the grave,
Your glory fills the highest place,
What can separate me now?

Verse 2

You go before me,
You shield my way,
Your hand upholds me;
I know You love me.

And when the earth fades,
Falls from my eyes,
And You stand before me,
I know You love me;
I know You love me.

Bridge
You tore the veil,
You made a way,
When You said that it is done.

- - - - - - -

After watching 'The Passion', it made me realise how much our Saviour went through during His last moments on earth.

With the beating scenes playing, the sight of just the actor's face portraying the immense pain and bodily suffering that Christ took in (when in the first place was not deserved) just makes my heart cry out to Him.

Why Lord, why You?

I know the reason why He gave his life and suffered and died. But it's just the fact that men can be so evil and yet God still shows us the forbearance and send his one and only son to die for our sins is the kind of indubitable love that cannot be broken.

Seriously, who in the right mind would do such a thing? It's only and ultimately our Heavenly Daddy as He adores us!

With a relationship that I have with Him, I feel so secured as I know He's with me ;Always and Forever!

Being a Christian is not a religion, not someone who is protrayed to be a do goodder, not a chore, but a kinship of sheer intimacy that I have that no one and I mean no one can take it away! 

- - - - -

With all I do Lord, I'll honour You!

xx

//Slashin' on the Last Day..

You's are probably wonderin'.. Slashin'? Huh, What is this womann on bout?
Well, I'll tell ya what I'm on bout!

Let's just say that accidently (and stupidly) cutting myself while doing some media clippings and leaving a trail of fresh red blood towards the sink was not what I had in mind of ending my internship.

Only Kimberley, (one of my colleuge and the ONLY one that's not afraid by the sight of blood) was by my side, aiding to my every need. Then she assisted to have my finger be checked by the company doctor since it did not stop blooding even when pressure was pressed towards it.
I told her it was no drama and it's just a cut but she wouldnt hear it - which is a good thing cause I was WRONG!

During the visit, the assistants there were still trying to stop the bleeding but the doc said it would continue to bleed till the end of the day.

After a multiple times of wrapping and adding more bandages (due to the fact that the previous times, the blood was soaking through), I was told that I would need plastic surgery to fix the tip of my finger.

Hmm, I would rather put my trust in Him since He's the maker as well as healer for my body.

Then I was told to rest and not attend CG but hack, why not? I know, this time I have placed my stubborness to good use!

Sitting outside Mache at Vivo near the boat harbour was rather nice, especially with the scenary of boats and cruise ships passing by and it's surrounding lights.

Carl's junior did not do the job of filling us chickkas, it was Audrey's nice treat of Haagen Diaaz fon du that topped it off! (Cheers babe!)

Oh yeah, and here are the two pictures that Clara (the random dancer) took from our shopping trip of fridges, washing machines and vaccum cleaners!

I got it on with two cardboard old farts in uniforms.

Can someone say yummy?

//F (ather) A (nd) M (other) I L (ove) Y (ou) ..

You know what NAUSEATES me? The fact that at times (the number won’t be mentioned), I treat my family (mainly my Dad) like absolute crap and others (who don’t show me the UNCONDITIONAL LOVE like what my parents and siblings do) like royalty. Now that’s MESSED UP! To the MAX I might add!


Like SERIOUSLY, does the saying "blood is thicker than water" apply in my life? Yes, I do LOVE, CHERISH and HONOUR my folks, but sometimes or all times, actions do speak LOUDER than words.
I don’t think talking back, bickering which amounts to screaming and hollering, using and saying unwanted phrases or words out of anger and even vulgarity (I know I know, there’s no sign of respect there) shows anything of LOVE, CHERISH and HONOUR towards my love ones > ___ , <

THEN WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE THE TENDANCY OF DOING IT?
The worst part of it all, is picking yourself up with the AFTERMATH of a super nasty fight. With the guilt that PLAGUES you and the “ Damnit, why did I say that or do that? ”, makes it all the better to plot up an APOLOGY which the other party (mainly my Dad & Mum and silblings on a lesser note) by now has experienced it like what, a MILLION times already?

With all said and done, I know one thing; it’s NEVER too late to change. Though I’m reaching the point of my woman-hood (don’t laugh), and still behave and think like a 7yr old (what, barbies are cool okay? *pouts and crosses arms*), it’s about time to do someGROWING UP!

Special note to family*
Thank you for taking all my nonsensical crap DAD, MUM, DAD, MIKE, DAD, BEN, DAD, SAM, and oh yar, DAD! I’m extremely BLESSEDwith parents and siblings who DOTE on me so much and OVER-LOOKING my countless amount of flaws and scars that I've left behind. ITHANK the Lord for you guys! 
MUCH MUCH MUCH MUCH MUCH LOVE.

XOXOXOXOXO

//He takes me back always..

Even when the fight is over now.. And even when the pain is coming through! Always ALWAYS! He'll be there standing and smiling at my disappointed face with his arms open wide, even when I've done things that are displeasing in his eyes. No matter the severity of the matter, He'll invariably welcome me back without any exceptions.

The fact is that I've taken this for granted many MANY times. Which would lead to a buildup of self condemnation and a disgusting sense of infirmity plauging my emotions and endless trail of thoughts. The only way to stablize this so called "disease" would be talking to Him. It's as simple as that, SERIOUSLY!

Just embracing in His presence when I'm alone in my bedroom really brings me a sense of Joy and Peace. Though I'm talking to the ceiling or wall, I somehow know that He's listening and replying back in His own way. So basically I'm having a 2-way convo with a person i can't see face to face, but can DEFINITELY feel heart to heart!

So peoples, whenever you're feeling sad and low.. Just open your mouth and spill EVERYTHING to him! The gift of tongues is also very useful, as it also brings you to another level.. A more intimate and experience of the innermost!

//The time has come, and it's just the beginning..

The Lord truly makes ALL things beautiful IN HIS TIME! No matter how hard we attempt to achieve what we want like rushing, over planning, enforcing the matter(s), it can never turn out the way He planned already.

I'm rejoycing because THE TIME HAS COME! He has answered my prayers of..

i) Finding a PR Company

: I have found my internship and has already started!

ii) A Cell Group

: I have FINALLY joined a cell group from New Cre!

The rest of my prayers are still pending but IN HIS TIME, it will reveal itself and come to life not because I deserve it,

but because HE L.O.V.E.S ME.

xx

//Launching into the deep..

and letting down my NETS for a CATCH! Yesh, I stole that from the good old book of Luke! But the actual reference would be:

Luke 5:44

"When He had stopped speaking, He said to Simon, “Launch out into the deep and let down your nets for a catch."

So what does this verse mean? Well first of all, it means a lot to me as it applies to my life right now! And second of all, it means that God is going to BLESS me BIG BIG TIME! So why wait?

That's why I'm launching into the deep (Aka: Going into the unkown and doing something that I've never dreamt of or thought I would actually do it) and letting down my nets for a catch! (Aka: Getting hold of the PLENTIFUL ABUNDANCE and OVER-FLOWING BLESSING!

I was once scared, but now I'm FREE! FREE from the dependence of holding on to people and not going out by myself! Free from the 'shoulda woulda coulda' syndrome and of course, the buts! FREE from the fear of what is going to happen and lastly, FREE from my own self inflicted emotions that are the source of my worries and fear of trying out new things and going beyond the things that I would normally do!

Mann, the Lord is truly so SO good to us! Really! He has seen us through everything, the good AND the bad! Mountain or no mountain, valley or no valley, we should STILL praise him no matter the situation! Because HE'S the GOD that is ABOVE ALL powers, ALLnature, ALL created things, ALL wisdom of men, ALL kingdoms, thrones, and ALL wealth and treasures of the earth!

" Like a rose.. Trampled on the ground.. You took the fall.. And thought of me.. Above all! "

Thank you Yeshua – It is done.

;; I know you L.O.V.E me!

*Exam Fever*

//Procrastinating Syndrome.


Basically, I'm just hoping and wishing that this week would be more productive compared to last week (Where i just lazed around doing shit all, Went out 24'7 and Didnt even bother to sort out my uni files, Open my darn text books and Start i dont know.. NERDING?

Not only that, I'll have to sort out my Business Stats from last summer before the term starts (to see if they would let me off and give me my conceded pass - amen amen), Find a PR consultancy job after the exams (Don't know where to start or Any companies in mind) and Get back my unpaid salary from last yr Sept.  
Can't you sort out the pattern of delaying everything? 

*Let out a big sigh* 

Also lately, I've been feeling REALLY EMPTY inside. Something is REALLY MISSING. Like where's the JOY, where's the FIRE and where's the LOVE for the lord that i use to have? I have to really come to point, where i CAN'T BE STUFFED with ANYTHING.  

Going to church, attending a cell group, serving in the ministy - ALL that, I YEARN for it SO BADLY, Yet I just let time do its chore, and pass by without anything being done. 

*Letting out another sigh* 

With this, I tried to find "joy" at other places or beings but that doesn't even reach the surface or give me a TRUE SENSE of what joy really is.

All I can say is this:
" Lord, I'm crying out to you right now. In times like this, your the only one and truly the only one that could give me the true shalom, love and joy that I'm yearning for! "

//tc&godbless ; much <3